My Reasons

My Reasons

This Is Where It All Begins

This Is Where It All Begins

Saturday, January 28, 2017

for real, seriously, for freaking real!

Warning: lots of poop and bum talk in this post.

So, this week was a rough one.  Let's get real.  It was hell...o (for the kids, when they read this later, mommy added the O for you)

Well, life with 5 young kids always has it's great moments
She is so cute it hurts
full of giggles, playing, peace, hugs and precious times

and it has its rip your hair out, eyeballs bulging, what the crap, where can I run, head into wall moments.

This week, seemed to have a lot of the latter in it...a lot.

Aside from potty training, this was Molly most of the time, if she wasn't on my hip or in my arms.

Don't let these pictures deceive you.  I am not a terrible mommy that just took a picture of my crying child and walked away.

I did take the picture, but I also had been holding her and comforting her to no avail for the last 30 minutes with her thrashing and head banging me in the nose and chin, and soon after the picture, I comforted her again, which lasted all of 2 seconds.

Her potty training went amazingly well!  Two days, done.  She had peeing down.  Miracle of all miracles.  After potty training 5 kids and a dog, the heavens had mercy on my soul.

The only accidents she has, is if she is out of the norm and I forget to remind her, or if she can't get to the toilet fast enough.


Pooping however, is another matter.  She refuses to poop in the toilet!  She hides in corners, and poops her pants every day.

It has completely baffled me.  I have read articles, talked to other mothers, and tried several bribery tactics, but to no avail.

The two times I found her hiding, I carried her to the toilet, where she screamed in complete agony, and then pooped followed by lots of blood.

Alarm bells!

So, Molly was pooping her pants, throwing fits, screaming at everyone, crying all day, and not letting me get more than 6 inches away...ever.  Including shower, eating, getting ready for the day, and so on.  I was worried about her, but also at my wits end!  The doctor was not answering.

Add William and Luke deciding they were "sick" on Friday (which is normally my hard/favorite workout day, caffeine day..happy happy joy joy, get Molly to sleep and watch my favorite Hulu show day, and my get ready for the weekend day).  I usually love Fridays.

This Friday was an epic disaster in every way.

The whole week was insanely busy every single day, the weather was grey and gloomy, the kids have been acting like they want to kill eachother, and Molly has been a hot mess.

Yeah, there's my rant, and there's my week.

It sucked.
Friday sucked the worst.  By far.

But, it did finally convince me to get Molly in to a doctor.  If my doctor wasn't available, we would go to the after hours clinic, and wait forever, and then some more.
I had had enough, and I suspected that she had strep in her bum, again.

I took her to the after hours clinic, and sure enough, she tested positive for anal strep for the 4th time in the four months since she got her tonsils out.  You want the real irony???  The first diagnosis was just 2 days, TWO DAYS after she got her tonsils out.  (slam palm into forehead)

I learned more about how this form of strep feels, and I admit, I wanted to dig a hole for all mean mommy's in the world, full of all things awful, and jump in.

Basically, the horrid, want to stab yourself, grimacing pain you feel when you swallow something like chips or captain crunch cereal when you have strep throat (yes, I have LOTS of experience), is exactly what it feels like for Molly, in her bum, when she poops.

Holy crap! Literally.

And, the overall pain you feel in your throat when you have strep, she feels in her bum, all day long. Not to mention, fever, body aches, chills, the works.  She did have that last week, but she also had a bad cold, so I didn't know what was causing it.

It was so bad, that she was bleeding when she was pooping, and her insides in that area are a disaster. It hurts her so badly to poop, that she holds it, and therefore gets totally backed up.

It is not at all normal to get strep in your bum at Molly's age, and it is even more abnormal to have it back to back like this.

We are back to square freaking one.  ARGH!

The doctors are worried that her bum has the same drug-resistant bacteria in it that her tonsils had.  Unfortunately, there is nothing to "remove" in that area, like the tonsils,  to cure it.

Who knows where the strep would decide to breed next anyway.

The problem is, that if this keeps happening, Molly could have damage to her rectum, her intestines (from not pooping because it hurts), and from secondary skin infections from the horrible rash that is always raw, open, and present.


So, we are back to getting some tests done.

The doctor referred us to a pediatric infectious disease specialist, that will be calling us on Monday to set an appointment. 

We are hoping and praying that he can figure out what in her body is not fighting off the strep, and find a way to strengthen it.  Most likely an auto immune disease, but she has already been tested for tons of them already. Everything came back negative...and the whole process freaked me out.  The list of diseases went on for miles and gave me nightmares.

We really have no clue, but we are so hopeful that this doctor can help.  People fly in to see him from around the country, so I am hoping that says something. We are very lucky that he is here in Utah.

Poor little Molly girl.
Get better sweetheart.

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