My Dr. appointment was today, and I had my third ultrasound. The doctor knows me well enough by now, to know that he should just get on with it, and talk later. The anxiety almost kills me....literally. My blood pressure today (taken before the ultrasound) was 25 points higher than it has ever been in my entire life. It was well above normal for anyone. I was told not to worry unless it stays that way up until the next appointment, then we may have some problems. Right.
But, I am not focusing on that at the moment.
About the ultrasound....
The picture on the screen was a HUGE difference from just two weeks ago. I was completely shocked, as was Dr. Weary. It was amazing! The baby totally took off and grew a ton in just two weeks. It not only grew the normal amount, but more than doubled that! That could explain why I haven't been able to keep my eyes open. (in all of the excitement, I completely forgot to ask about my iron levels, oops) Really, that is some serious growth in just 14 days. The baby and I are back to being on track with the pregnancy. I am nine weeks along, and my due date is back to June 4th...my birthday. Hip Hip Hooray!
The baby was going crazy in there, and we got some awesome pictures. It was moving so fast, that the doctor had to get several pictures to try to get all of the features in. Dr. Weary said that in all of his career, he has never seen fingers so well defined in an ultrasound as early as nine weeks. You could literally see every single one as clear as day. My baby was waving to me and telling me not to worry so much and to send dad, Mary and Sam a big hello.
I completely and whole-heartedly connected with my baby today. It has every shred of my heart now. There is no turning back.
I have been trying not to get to attached, out of fear of losing this child. I have done a great job until today. It was just too wonderful of an experience and the pictures were so clear. Dr. Weary just kept looking and looking. He was so excited with how clear the features of the baby were. He even laughed at one point when the baby just went nuts. He looked like a kid with a new toy. It was like the baby was looking right at us and totally showing off.
I know this was a gift from above. I was blessed to see, so incredibly clearly and accurately, my little baby. It was just what my heart needed, even though I didn't realize it before the fact. It is amazing how healing it was. It was not a normal 9 week ultrasound as far as clarity, and the doctor and I both knew that. It was well above and beyond. The baby measured nine weeks, but the features were just amazing. The look of shock on Dr. Weary's face, clearly matched mine. I believe in miracles, and I witnessed another one today.
Heaven forbid I lose this child. My heart couldn't do it. Not after today. This baby is mine, it belongs to us. It belongs to my heart.
The doctor said that the appointment could not have gone better. There are a few things around the baby that, if they show up again at my next appointment, could become a big concern. But for now, he said not to worry and to enjoy the pictures. Of course I will worry, but that just comes with the package.
My heart is so full today. I am just so happy. I saw the heart beat once again. And to me, that is all that matters.